Making relationships work
How do we make relationships work?, hmmm! it takes the grace of God and a lot of good notion including patience understand and perseverance and most relationship have stress and crisis, so making sacrifice for that relationship will go a along way, but it is always worth the while if properly applied, there are so many information, prompts and advice out there and sometimes they could be reliable and sometimes it is not worth accepting because they look like junk automatically means it is not a good advice and it is not worth reading because they are most times contradicting and confusing. The unfortunate thing is that most information given is one-sided and does not apply to everybody because of the fact that different problems needs different solutions and i am being brief about what advice I can give about making a relationship work. There are some elements of truth about stability in a good relationship. Some factors that make relationships work are:
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- Trust: A good, healthy and loving relationship relies on trust and faith in whomever you are dealing with which includes marriages and others, for without trust, chaos, confusion and pestilence will arise in that relationship and from a layman’s point of view, a relationship without trust is like telephone without service, which is almost like a relationship without a good foundation. lack of trust can lead to you checking on him all the time believing in what you imagine which could be baseless. lets say he is away on a conference, you are there worried about what he or she is doing and who they are with and all kinds of thought will be flowing through your mind. Unnecessary insecurities due to lack of trust will lead to constant quarrel and commotions at home which if looked critically could end up driving both of you apart instead of getting close. I get it, there has been a bad experience about a past relationship. but we need to forget about our past and move on or else you will have trust issue in your relationship which you need to avoid.
The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships
- communication : Do you communicate with your partner at all? some people have problem expressing their feelings and what they think with their friend and partner, but why? of what value is that relationship when there is no room for proper communication. Lack of communication with your partner is a big problem. It is in your best interest to tell him your opinion, then you can both solve whatever problem you may have and it will create room for understanding which is always the case with communicating to each other and not keeping quiet. improper communication might lead to survival problems in that relationship. There are some factors that needs consideration when communicating and these includes respect and talking calmly and reasonably to each other and this could be a better solution to all problems which will call for understand and therefore solution.
- Love: There is that saying which says “love conquers them all”. It is the major reason which brings two people together anyways and sometimes some people decide to get together and live together even if they don’t love each other and its an incredible situation and with time they may fall in love with each other and this love situation will help in solving most problems, no matter how tough and if both parties fall apart that same love that brought them together the first time will always bring them back. For peace, understanding and love to reign in any relationship you must learn to:
- Understand your partner at all cost
- Give love honor and respect to each other
- Try creating moment for connection and communication
- Learn to share things in common
- Cope with situations and problems wisely and strategically no matter how tough
- Learn to dialogue as much as you can
Trust and Distrust
Trust is the beginning of every good marriage, but when trust is not there anymore, it takes the grace of God for trust to exist again in that relationship. A spouse can forgive, but that painful experience will make it difficult for the offended spouse to let go for fear that it could happen again. For some, it is easier to forgive than to forget. Trusting and getting hurt is bad enough, so, taking chances for the occurrence is not an option? Putting up barriers of protection is not uncommon for a wounded spouse.
Distrust is very common between spouses especially when one has cheated and this situation might weaken a marriage that needs trust to grow. Distrust is like putting on a guard if in any way there is cheating or occurrence of it again. It is a means of protection. On the other hand, it is certainly not impossible to trust again, but it takes some effort and determination for it usually does not happen easily or quickly in any way.
A victim once said after reconciliation with her husband, that she realized what infidelity can cause to a family life and she compared it to a starving dog snatching a beautiful wedding cake. Getting the trust back was like looking for a piece of needle in a haystack but the truth is that the remaining cake was still beautiful, but the unforgettable part is that anytime you look at the remaining cake you kind of miss the complete cake before the dog got into it and that makes you bitter, sad and angry. the question is, how could a loving spouse take such beauty away from a loved one he promised to cherish? that kind of pain is often indescribable and a lot will surely be affected including Life itself.
Marriage is not the only institution that has cheating issues . Many Cheaters victimize their relationships with children, loving friends, other close family members, and even themselves. The bad part about this is that it may affect cheaters’ families because of the pain, embarrassment, and awareness of community gossip it will cause. most times such scandal can lower the value or importance of a family within a community. The whole families may suffer because of it. A good friend does not want to witness her best friend’s husband in a compromising situation with another women. A member of the family does not want to hear gossip about their loved one from other people in the community. the Young people contemplating marriage one day might lose faith and respect in the marriage institution due to this infidelity crisis in the society, and celebrity gossip on the media is not helping either. All of these life experiences are painful for many family members and others to bear when it comes to issues of cheating and infidelity.
The unfortunate thing is that cheating and crisis at home always have very bad or negative effects on the children because it gets them confused and they end up being the most wounded victims. A lot of children suffer silently and some could blame themselves and the bad part is that this parent problem could spill over into the rest of their lives thereby causing various dysfunctions in their own personal families. The best thing to do if situations like this arise is to go for counseling but many families do not look at it that way because many families do not see the need to get it.
Beyond Boundaries: Learning to Trust Again in Relationships
Cheating is never a good thing both in a marriage or any relationship, and making irrelevant and unnecessary excuses are not acceptable either and as we all know the consequences are always devastating for all parties involved, especially the children and the offended spouse.“Sometime the effects of cheating on the victims involved could be devastating especially, if they end up living that relationship for another and it could be a problem if the parties involved are not fully healed, so the best we can do to avoid any kind of trauma in our lives is being sincere and honest with our friends, spouse and acquaintances.
HOW GLORIOUS WAS THAT FAITHFUL DAY WHEN THE TWO LOVE BIRDS MET AND FINALLY DECIDED AFTER A WHILE TO SAY I DO AND HOW PAINFUL IT IS AFTER A LOT OF GOOD AND BLISS TIME TOGETHER,WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND ONE SAYING GOODBYE MY DEAR, AFTER A WHIRL WIND WHICH BREAKS THEM APART LIKE A TREE WICH IS BROKEN INTO TWO AFTER A TERRIBLE WIND.
IT WAS A VERY PAINFUL AND MEMORY DAY WHEN THE MAN WAKES UP AND SAID I DONT UNDERSTAND MYSELF AND AFTER A SHORT TIME SAYS UNEXPECTED GOODBYE, I HEAR THE TRUMPET CALL.
THE MORNING BELL SOUNDS WHEN THE BELOVED SAYS BYEEEE AND THERE GOES THE SINGING BIRD SINGING: LO! I TELL YOU A MYSTERY . WE SHALL NOT ALL SLEEP ,BUT WE SHALL ALL BE CHANGED,IN A MOMENT,IN THE TWINKLING OF AN EYE,AT THE TRUMPET.FOR THE TRUMPET WILL SOUND, AND MAN WILL BE RAISED IMPERISHABLE,AND WE SHALL BE CHANGED.FOR THE PERISHABLE NATURE MUST PUT ON THE IMPERISHABLE,AND THIS MORTAL NATURE MUST PUT ON IMMORTALITY.WHEN THE PERISHABLE PUTS ON THE IMPERISHABLE,AND THE MORTAL PUTS ON IMMORTALITY,THEN SHALL COME TO PASS THE SAYING THAT IS WRITTEN DEATH IS SWALLOWED UP IN VICTORY.
FOR WE KNOW THAT IF THE EARTHLY TENT WE LIVE IN IS DESTROYED,WE HAVE A BUILDING FROM GOD, A HOUSE NOT MADE WITH HANDS,ETERNAL IN HEAVENS.
HOW DOES IT FEEL WHEN BROKEN AWAY FROM YOUR LOVED ONES?